Building Assertiveness

Building Assertiveness:

Learning to say no

Before you begin, remember to:

• Be honest and open with yourself
• Treat yourself with kindness and respect
• Be present
• Enjoy!

What is assertiveness?

• Being clear, open and honest about your needs
• Ensuring everyone's wants and needs are considered
• Clearly and calmly standing up for yourself
• Agreeing compromise.

Why is assertiveness important?

People who are assertive in a positive manner thrive in the workplace. They are able to voice their opinions, ideas and concerns in a way which doesn't hurt other's feelings.

Encouraging assertiveness in a team lowers stress and anxiety, reduces ambiguity, and boosts productivity by allowing colleagues to prioritise.

“Assertiveness is valuing yourself
and your needs as equal to the
values and needs of other people.”

Learning to say no.

Do you ever automatically agree with others? Being able to say no is a common boundary issue in maintaining assertiveness. Take a couple of minutes to think about what prevents you from saying no, even when you want to.

Saying no takes practice.

Lack of confidence can lead to you to think people won’t like or respect you if you say no. Try not to be hard on yourself if you still end up saying yes to things you don’t want to or don’t have time for.

Drop the guilt.

In situations where you want to say no, remember:
• You can’t do everything
• You’re not being selfish
• You can’t please everyone
• Take notice of the tactics people use to get you to say yes.

Take some time to think about why saying no might feel difficult. Now, reflect on ways you could counter these barriers in the future.

Know your rights.

Assertiveness rights are how you are allowed to speak and are spoken to, psychological interaction and physical contact. Asking for what you want, having an opinion, making decisions and mistakes, and being successful are all our rights.

Know your boundaries.

Being conscious of your personal boundaries will help you to protect:
• Your time
• Your emotions
• Your ‘feel good’ moments
• Your values.

Don't forget.

Next time you want to practice assertiveness, remember to ask yourself:
• Am I being clear with what I am asking?
• Am I being brief and concise?
• Have I apologised when I didn’t need to?
• Am I being polite but firm?
• Am I be open and honest?